Emotionally, I don’t feel good. I’m filled with, sadness.
Ya, tahu, I can’t let small matters bring me down. I shouldn’t.
Tapi bila Nisha sedih, I feel myself falling apart, literally. Rasa lemah sangat, rasa macam nak rebah. Every time. If I have to walk, it’s gonna be a slow one. It’s like I don’t have the energy to do anything.
Sampai macam tu sekali. Ya Allah. Astaghfirullahalazim.
I know, I know. Kalau boleh jangan banyak sedih pasal dunia… Akhirat tu yang penting. I know that. But some things, they just make me shattered, torn and wounded.
It hurts to even think about it.
And Ya Allah, I’ve always, always wanted to just go to a place yang sangat tenang. So I can just stare and enjoy the beauty of nature.
For instance, just sit down somewhere, looking at the green trees, enjoying the scenery with the open blue sky.. Or lie down, stargazing, feeling the night breeze.
I really, really wanna do that someday.
One of the must-do things that are on the top of my wish list.
Mungkin tak ada rezeki sekarang. Maybe one day, I’ll actually do that.
Rasa nak nangis sebenarnya. I’m sorry for letting this out on you. Hmph. I keep on sighing tonight.
Apa apa pun, these quotes popped in my head sambil2 bersedih ni.
“Believe in Allah and everything will be fine.”
“Kenapa la difikir sangat cinta manusia… Sedangkan cinta Allah pun entah ke mana.”
“Ingin mengadu? Allah sentiasa ada bersama kamu.”
“Nisha, you are stronger than you think you are so don’t fall apart so easily.”
“My prayers are with u, ingt Allah sentiasa n selawat ok? Take care.”
Allah will give you all the strength you need. Just trust Him and pray.